Childbirth class, session 2
Last night was our second childbirth class. And it was a doozy. I think I must still be an immature 7th grader at heart because I had a hell of a time watching the two births on video. At first, it was just an animation, then Bam! without warning it got real. There’s the baby’s head popping right out of the mom, and oh wow, there goes a massive football sized placenta! Oh my God, they set the mutant-sized placenta beside the bed so mom could take a look. It was bigger than the baby! I began to dry heave at this point. I have to do THAT in 5 months? Oh there better be LOTS.OF.DRUGS. Meet me at the parking lot with drugs, people!
Then we saw another natural birth. She had a very, very supportive supportive husband, who was so supportive, he got down in a table position in the middle of the hospital hall to let her stretch. Then, she hung on to his back and they did this penguin waddle waltz down the hall. It was supposed to help loosen up the baby or something. To me, it looked just nuts and I cannot even imagine Chris doing any of that stuff. But I will say the husband was extremely supportive and I know Chris will be in his on way.
Which brings me to a funny nickname my co-worker/friend Nancy came up with for the baby. She said she was going to start calling our little fetus the “eBaby.” Which, is actually pretty fitting considering I am married to Mr. Internet. Another co-worker has apparently said Chris invented the Internet, along with Al Gore. I swear Chris will be live blogging or at least Twittering the birth of our first child. He better make sure that his laptop has good insurance because if he brings that thing in the delivery room, I may just toss it out the window!
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